You Are What You Drive

I judge you by what you drive.

If you drive a Hummer you don't recycle and couldn't give two shits about the environment (fucking americans).

If you drive a Jeep that isn't in the Wrangler family, you're a yuppy wanna-be.

If you drive a Wranger you are outdoorsy but couldn't give a damn about saving the environment.

If your car is older then you are, you live with your parents and are too lazy to get a job. Exception to the previous is if you drive a reconditioned classic- in which case you are trying to relive your childhood.

If you drive a fancy sports car you either have a small penis or penis envy.

If you drive a pseudo-sports care (like a Miata) you are pretending you're rich, but in reality barely make over minimum wage.

If you drive a mommy-mobile you need a lesson on contraception.

If you drive anything less than a 2500 (or 250 in Ford) truck or ANY truck with a short bed I want to beat the crap out of you. That isn't a fucking truck, moron.

There are more, but I can't see any other type of car out the window at this moment. Basically, if you don't drive a hybrid I am going to judge you harshly.