The Other Woman

When a man dies, occasionally there is a string of women left to mourn him. Ex-girlfriends who haven't let go. A wife or fiance. His mistress. All whom usually sit civilly looking at his dead body and mourn in silence. Very rarely does anyone make a scene. I remember the first ex-boyfriend I planted. It had been nearly three years since the last time we talked when I got the call to pick him up from the morgue. He had done his pre-planning with me while we were together, and his fiance followed through with his plans.

When I started working on him, it hit me that nothing had changed. He still looked the same as he had, and he was still being unpredictable, dying of a brain aneurysm in the middle of the night. I couldn't help but wonder if he also still had a mistress tucked away somewhere. After talking to his fiance, I gathered that she had no idea we had a past together, which was fine by me. That could complicate things and I am a fan of everything running smoothly. I dressed him in the suit he specified in his pre-plans, which coincidentally, was the suit I met him in four years prior.

The viewing was going well until I saw a familiar face walk in. His 'other woman' while we had been together. She walked over to me while I was handing out a prayer card to the a gentleman sitting next the fiance of the stiff. For some reason she found it dreadfully important to ask if I was still with him when he died and how could I steal him away from her (I guess I was the other woman...) and continued to make a big scene. The, for lack of a better word, widow starts becoming hysterical. Asking if I was the one he was cheating on her with.

At this point I have lost total control of the viewing. I had two women who still loved the deceased yelling at me and each other. Family members trying to get in the middle of it. And a confused colleague who walked up from the preparation room. He was able to calm things down and take my place allowing me to finish the body he was working on. Since then, I have avoided working viewings... they can get a little rough.